Talking to children about crises: 7 tips for parents
Updated · 5 min read
New here? Start with our overview of home readiness – what to have ready, and why.
When war and crises fill the news, they reach children too - at school, on screens and in the conversations around them. The Danish Agency for Civil Protection has gathered seven tips on how parents can talk with their children about crises and worries.[1] They are less about what you say and more about how you listen.
In short: Ask and listen, take feelings seriously and answer simply and honestly for your child's age. Help separate facts from rumours, keep everyday routines, point to hope and things you can do - and show calm.[1]
1. Ask and listen
Ask calmly and concretely what your child has heard, is thinking about or is worried about.[1] That way you start from your child's questions - not your own.
2. Take feelings seriously
Even if you think there's no reason to worry, brushing it off rarely helps.[1] Acknowledge that it can feel unsettling before you talk about what is actually happening.
3. Adapt the conversation to your child's age
Answer simply, honestly and to the point of what your child asks. More information is not always more reassuring.[1]
4. Help separate facts from rumours
Children often piece a story together from fragments they've heard. Help your child tell what's true from rumours and half-stories.[1]
5. Create security close to home
It helps to hold on to everyday routines, friends, play, school, hobbies and family life.[1] The familiar and close-by gives calm when the world outside feels uncertain.
6. Point to hope and things you can do
Talk about everything people do to help - and about the small but meaningful things.[1]
One concrete thing to do is to put the family's readiness together: let your child help find the torch, check the radio or fill the water carrier. The authorities recommend that every household can manage on its own for three days if a crisis hits.[2]
7. Show calm - even when it's hard
Children read adults' reactions to judge how dangerous something is.[1] Your calm is one of the most important things you can pass on.
If the worry is overwhelming
If your child - or you - needs support, the authorities refer to Save the Children Denmark (Red Barnet), the Danish Red Cross (Røde Kors) and Børns Vilkår.[1]
To make your family's readiness concrete, read on here: Readiness for the whole family: children, elderly and pets
Frequently asked questions
How do I talk to my child about war?
Ask calmly what your child has heard and is thinking, and take their feelings seriously. Answer simply, honestly and to the point of what they ask - more information is not always more reassuring.
Should I hide my own worry from my child?
Children read adults' reactions to judge how dangerous something is. That's why the authorities advise showing calm - even when it's hard.
Where can we get help if the worry is overwhelming?
The authorities refer to Save the Children Denmark (Red Barnet), the Danish Red Cross (Røde Kors) and Børns Vilkår if you need support.
Sources
- [1]Styrelsen for Samfundssikkerhed (samsik.dk): Tal med børn om kriser og bekymringer
- [2]Styrelsen for Samfundssikkerhed (samsik.dk): Sådan forbereder du dig